How to Ladies Lunch

I am one-third back--and counting. Some say it will take equal time to readjust to returning home as was spent traveling. So we're one-third there, or here, depending on how you look at it. I won't bore you with any of the re-entry drama.

The one talent Chrissie and I perfected in South America was the Ladies Lunch. So all of you out there thinking to yourself, "Those beyotches shouldn't complain about re-entry because it's been 20 years since I took more than 5 days off!", I say put your resentments aside. In one simple afternoon you can have what we had--a moment of pure joy and a celebration of friendship!

So think of a person or two you haven't seen for ages or someone you want to know better, pull out that calendar of yours, and mark an afternoon for a proper Ladies Lunch.

A few tips. First, make sure you have at least 3-4 hours to simply enjoy a long meal (all electronics turned off). I know, I can hear you, who has that kind of time when you're working, have a family, yah-dee yah-dee yah???!!! Well all I have to say is how much time do you spend a week on the internet or facebook? Hmmm, maybe it's about priorties and not just a matter of having time.

Ok, now tip two. Location is key, but not the most important factor. Nice is probably the most important factor, like table cloths rather than paper napkins. A view is a huge plus, like the view we had in Valpariaso. Outdoor is ideal (not easy in foggy San Fran), but not necessary because as you can see below we had a Ladies Lunch in a wine cave and that was delightful. 

And that leads me to tip three. Always start with a little taste of something like cheese and bread and a glass of bubbly, like a rose brute. If you're not a drinker like my not-such-a-lady-but-can-lunch-like-a-lady friend Timothy, any nice restaurant can mix up a delish palette livener to start off your Ladies Lunch.

And that reminds me, you needn't just lunch with Ladies. Any real man with an appetite for fun and food is a perfect companion for a Ladies Lunch, as learned by Lucia International.

I will say here for the wine drinkers that a bottle trumps by-the-glass for a LL. When you have 3-4 hours the tipsy factor is diluted by the consumption of food, water, coffee and dessert. It's all about pacing yourself. And if you happen to be in Europe or a fancy schmancy restaurant, there's often a half-bottle choice if you're feeling conservative about your afternoon wine intake.

  
Tip four is all about timing. In Buenos Aires we once broke a world record (at least we thought we did) when we started a Ladies Lunch at 2pm and finished at 8pm. The goal is to let your waiter know ahead of time that yes, this is a LL and that yes, you will be there until they close or they kick you out or until dinner starts. The best time to start a LL is about 1:30 or 2pm, this gives you time to get things done early in your day, plus you don't have to worry about eating dinner. It's perfect!

Tip five is about conversation--this is critical to the LL. Different Ladies have different preferences for conversation. Some like politics others prefer literature or philosophy. It's important to keep it lively and light with room for moments of deep conversation. There's always the wonderful conversation starter game of "Snog, Shag, Marry." (contact InkyThinky for game rules) The point is to enjoy your fellow Lady Luncher(s) and learn more about her/him or them. I learned that Chrissie would prefer to skip a course in the lunch meal to ensure she had room for dessert! Which brings me to another tip--go for at least 3 courses, preferably 4-5. If you only order a salad, well that's lunch, NOT a Ladies Lunch!!

Finally, it's important to remember you are never too full for dessert. Always order something to finish off your palette at the end, like cafe con leche y flan. This is the time during the Ladies Lunch where you can lean back in your chair, watch other diners, gaze at the view, talk about what you might do when you finish, like shopping or a walk around the block. This is also a perfect time to pull out those iPhone's and plan the next lunch in 4-6 months (or in a few days if you're out galivanting around the world).

What not to do during a LL? Ordering 2 shots of tequilla isn't the best idea. That's not really a proper lady thing to do. And that's about the only thing I can think of that you shouldn't do. (Note paper napkins as well, also a violation!)

Since I've been back so many people have commented about how lucky I was to have taken this trip. I see it differently. I feel grateful. I worked hard to make that trip happen--it wasn't a lucky lottery ticket win.  But I also know that I relied on so many people in so many different ways to make that trip possible--from the airlines to the hotel staff to the farmers and wine makers, and we can't forget the magic of the rivers, mountains and glaciers. I am so grateful I could be a part of the whole adventure and so deeply appreciative of my traveling companion Lady Elgar. And finally, if there is one thing this South American Aventura showed me over and over again, it is that life is precious and despite the showers of suffering around us, we have the opportunity every minute to choose gratitude and happiness.

All of those Ladies Lunches we had in South America were some of my most favorite and most memorable moments of the trip. And I don't have to travel thousands of miles to make those kinds of memorable moments.

So go on, pick up that phone and call a dear friend or two and schedule a Ladies Lunch and make some memorable moments. Tell us how it went...we can't wait to hear from you!

Bon appetit!

 

Six days

Memory is a funny thing--it conjurs, it allures, it terrifies, it lies, it reveals the truth, and most of all, it builds the vibrant narratives of our lives.

Six days into our return to life in the Northern Hemisphere Chrissie and I both agreed over a cup of tea via Skype today that it almost feels as if our three-month South American adventura never really happened. There seems to be a space between day-to-day reality and memory making that is a kind of limbo. I can barely feel the heat of Buenos Aires or hear the pound of the falls in Iguazu or taste the bite of malbec in Mendoza or breathe in the lushness of Peru. Memories are now starting to build and form and twist and turn, but the tangible touch of travel is dissipating.

The Secret Tonic
Early on into our trip dearest Alex sent me an article by a writer (can't remember his name) who so aptly wrote, "We travel because we need to, because distance and difference are the secret tonic of creativity. When we get home, home is still the same. But something in our mind has been changed, and that changes everything."

I'm not sure what in my mind has been changed, but I am restless and I am resisting all the blatant urgings around me to spend money, to need more, to do more, to want more. In six days I've thought of moving back to the City (SF), buy a car, buy a house in Healdsburg, quit my job, buy an entirely new wardrobe, go live in a tent and pack it all up and move to Peru to learn to drive a moto-taxi (that's my moto-taxi below).

So I decided to come here and do a little "inkythinky" to remind myself that this trip did happen and that I needn't do anything but be where I am. Perhaps amidst meetings, email, dinners, commuting, online shopping and a few hikes I will begin to get a glimpse into that little something in my mind that  changed over the last three months. Until then, I will keep popping back here and offering a few new narratives from the aventura.

Enjoy your week and keep an eye open for a posting on some very helpful guidelines on how to do a proper "ladies' lunch."

Sometimes you get what you ask for

Today as we got ready to board our American Airlines flight to Dallas, our last flight together, our final farewell to south and central america, our final hours in this grande aventura, I whined to Chrissie, "I don't want to go home." And that may be why I am propped up in bed at the Hyatt at the DFW Airport rather than watching a bad movie while eating bad food on a flight home to San Francisco. The good news is that as part of my $250 plus bill for tonight not only did I get a new toothbrush and comb (thank goodness cuz I threw out my kid's toothbrush I purchased back in Cuzco), I also got a "free" stick of Lady Speedstick deodorant. This is another perfect example of getting what you ask for because shortly before I exclaimed to Chrissie I wasn't leaving Costa Rica, I also exclaimed to her that I smelled awful because I forgot to primp with a bit of deodorant this morning. So tomorrow I'll be fresh and clean for my flight home to San Francisco, despite the fact that I'll be wearing the same clothes I had on today, and in fact, the same clothes I've been wearing for the last three months. But who's going to notice?

For some reason my flight got canceled due to bad weather, whilst at the same time Chrissie and Stevo lifted off to Heathrow and Dan is merrily on his way home out of Houston. On the bright side, I get to sit here and go through the gazillion pictures from our travels and remind myself of these last three months and conjure amazing memories which are too quickly beginning to fade around the edges, partially thanks to the bright and busy flash of the DFW Airport. What happened to the beach? Why is everyone so loud and speaking with funny accents? Why is it so clean here? Why is there so much stuff around? Why do I suddenly want to shop (the customs agent couldn't believe how little I claimed--and I was telling the truth, well close to the truth)? Where are all the mangy dogs? And where is that dear friend of mine with the ginger hair and the scars on the left of her temple?

Oh well. Thank goodness for Amex and airport hotels that make these kinds of experiences easier to stomach. I'm sitting here sipping tea, listening to Beethoven and marveling at the photos. Here are a few of my favorites from a rapid-shot photo shoot we did one morning in Mendoza at our favorite coffee shop. Thank you my dear friend for your laughter, your spirit and your company these last three months. I will treasure these memories forever!

And for those of you fearing the end of the Inky Thinky Aventura, thinky againy. There are loads of stories you still haven't heard, so stay tuned for "post script" stories, thinkie's and thoughts. And if you become sick of my memorializing of the South American excursions, then simply go back to your emails about oil spills, terrorists and other exciting news from around the world!

Hasta luego!

Jungle, Beach and more

This will be quick because I have to go meet up with Steve (Lady Elgar's prince), Chrissie, Terry (known to some as TAT and making friends everywhere in Costa Rica) and Dan (my man) at the beach. They have been out fishing for the last few hours and it's cerveza time.

Bobby and Genius have headed to the airport (I have a tear in my eye) and I am sitting here at the pool looking at the pacific wondering how in the hell I am going to be back in the office in five days.

But enough of that. Costa Rica esta buena! Chrissie and I spent our first few days getting lost and driving around in circles while enjoying the company of a few French Canadians and attending a horse parade! When the rest of the gang arrived, we found our bearings, headed for the beach and it's been nothing but fun and laughter since. We have done beach, Four Seasons posh, jungle, volcano, mud, hot springs, river jungle, aligators, monkeys, bugs, dogs, spiders, iguanas etc and we have eaten lots of pescado thanks to the talents of Chef Lucia (well everyone else has, I'm still sticking to my no fish diet!).

Enjoy the photos and perhaps more will come later today after a few beers and some reflection on how to put this whole adventure to a close. I will tell you that having all these wonderful people here this last week has made me so incredibly happy that I'm feeling so full I have no appetite. Well, maybe a little one, for a little beer and nachos.

Hasta luego!